The old rules don't work.
So we're writing new ones for women in tech who are done shrinking.
If you're here,
you already know.
You know what it's like to have your idea repeated by a man in a meeting and suddenly it's brilliant.
You know what it's like to be called "aggressive" for doing exactly what your male colleagues do and get praised for.
"While men share the same work and hear: This is great! Tell me more!"
You know what it's like to play by rules that were never designed for you.
If you're here, you're done with that.
And so am I.
My Story.
I've been in UX and product design for over 20 years.
I've worked with nearly 500 clients, from small startups to companies like Citi Mortgage, Prudential, and Intuit. I studied under conversion optimization experts Bryan and Jeffrey Eisenberg. I ran my own studio for 18 years. I know this work inside and out.
I also spent several years as a Customer Success Lead. That experience taught me how to listen, how to navigate difficult conversations, and how to understand what people actually need versus what they say they need. It also gave me a front-row seat to how differently I was communicated with compared to my male colleagues. It helped me see the patterns.
As a queer, neurodivergent woman in tech, I've navigated not just gender bias, but multiple intersecting dynamics that make workplace navigation even more complex. I already knew about masking and being hyper-aware of how I was perceived. I knew what it was like to be "too much" and "not enough" simultaneously.
I've had other people take credit for my ideas. I've had my technical knowledge questioned in meetings while less experienced men were assumed experts. I've been passed over for opportunities I was overqualified for. I've been told I was "too direct" for communicating the exact same way as my male colleagues.
For years, I learned the "rules":
Speak their language
Show ROI
Earn a seat at the table
Don't be too emotional
Don't be too aggressive
Be confident but not threatening
The rules didn't work.
"They were never designed for us to win."
So I stopped playing by them.
Why Unrule
Exists.
I looked around at what was happening in my life and the lives of women I knew in tech. The same patterns, over and over:
- Brilliant women getting dismissed
- Contributions getting erased
- Credit getting stolen
- Being told to "speak up more" then punished when we do
- Facing constant low-level undermining
This is the problem I need to solve.
What Unrule
Actually Is.
Unrule delivers strategy, not feel-good platitudes.
It's not about "leaning in" or "finding your voice."
Unrule is about strategy.
- Recognizing patterns before they derail you
- Documenting work before credit gets stolen
- Navigating power dynamics without burning out
- Building exit plans when staying isn't worth it
Built on a simple framework: Stay, Switch, or Build.
We're not here to play by broken rules.
We're here to write our own.
This isn't about inspiration. It's about protection. It's about actionable tools for women who are done shrinking themselves to fit into spaces that don't want them to succeed.
Some of you will use these tools to navigate your current workplace and advocate more effectively.
Some of you will use them to recognize early warning signs and build an exit before you get pushed out.
Some of you will use them to build your own businesses and never have to deal with this again.
All of these are valid.
The old rules say you have to choose: stay and suffer, or leave and struggle.
We're writing a new rule: Protect yourself, build strategically, and leave on your own terms when you're ready.
Who This Is For.
Unrule is for women in UX, product, tech, and creative fields who:
- Are tired of ideas being dismissed until a man repeats them
- Are done being called "difficult" for advocating for users
- Know they're strategic but contributions keep getting erased
- Want actionable tools, not inspirational quotes
- Are ready to navigate strategically or exit intentionally
- Are done shrinking
This is also for:
- Trans women who face these dynamics plus additional barriers
- Non-binary folks navigating gendered workplace expectations
- Anyone who's been told they're "too much" or "not enough"
This is not for:
- People who think "just work harder" solves systemic bias
- People who want to be told everything is fine
- People looking to validate staying in toxic situations
- People who think asking nicely fixes power imbalances
The Bottom Line.
The old rules don't work because they were never designed for us to win.
So we're writing new ones.
- Rules that prioritize our wellbeing over someone else's comfort.
- Rules that document our contributions before they can be stolen.
- Rules that recognize toxic patterns early and give us permission to leave.
- Rules that let us build on our own terms.
What Happens Next.
You have options:
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Learn moreThis is Unrule.
"Not a movement. Not a manifesto.
Just practical tools for women
who are done playing small."
Welcome.
Naomi